Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Sleeping With The Enemy

Image courtesy:venture.com
A groggy Sunday morning and the newspaper headline screams at you, jolting you out of your reverie. Sleeping with your boss can boost your career; with a picture of Paris Hilton smiling vacuously at you for effect (that pic was part of another cocaine related report). You no longer need your shot of caffeine to kick start the day, you’ve already had enough.

A US survey has revealed that sleeping with the boss helps women climb several notches up the corporate ladder. You can be a smart ass chick, be brainier than Einstein, but the well being of your career depends on the presence of a ‘sugar daddy’ willing to give you that extra push or so says the report (wondering whether a boss-type funded this report). But considering how asinine most of our bosses are (am thinking of my last boss) this is a really scary proposition.

So will Business schools now be introducing “sleeping strategies” as part of their curriculum, with helpful visuals of Sharon Stone’s classic act in Basic Instinct?

If you are thinking of trying to make a career in Indian Politics, there’s some really bad news for you. According to a report in TOI, India may have the youngest population of the world’s biggest countries, but it has the oldest ministerial candidates. The average age of an Indian cabinet minister is 64.4. Yes, we are being governed by old fogies and young aspiring women leaders are expected to to deal with them. The safest, sleep-worthy cabinet can be found in UK, where the average age of an elected cabinet is 53.



I think I’ve got the answer to the sleeping around pandemic that’s affecting office culture. According to a survey conducted in Britain, marriage actually ruins your sex life. Quite a few of the interviewed couples admitted that their relationship was more like friends rather than lovers and they prefer getting a good nights’ sleep over spontaneous sex. Why? So that they can arrive bright eyed, bushy tailed to their office and make a move for their boss.

Image courtesy:ibnlive.in.com
Our honourable judges on the other hand do not believe in sleeping around and prefer resorting to traditional methods to further their career. Five judges belonging to the state subordinate judiciary were caught copying while writing their master of law exams. One of the judges was found cheating from a law book hidden under his answer sheet, while written slips and pages torn from textbooks were seized from other judges. The copy cat judges have been placed under suspension by Andhra Pradesh HC. Lawmakers makers turn lawbreakers.

Next time when you bite into that apple, remember to pay a silent thanks to the chaotic cosmos. A study shows that the apple may have evolved as a direct result of the comet impact thought to have wiped out dinosaurs 65 million years ago. And don’t we all know how the humble fruit changed the course of History and resulted in some Biology. Imagine Eve trying to tempt Adam with bite sized dinosaurs? Ugh….

And before I sign off, an update on Ms Hilton’s smile. Paris (the socialite) was arrested for possession of cocaine which she now claims is a case of grave miss-understanding. Gee, I thought the cocaine was chewing gum. Next time, come up with a better excuse girl!


49 comments:

  1. Amusing news and equally intriguing views on the news. Remember the look I told you about. :)

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  2. Aww Ms. Hilton how much we miss her pairing with Britney Spears. Hope these two get back 2gether....

    What u said is absolutely true ...but I never knew even the Americans shared the same opinion
    Even if u dont sleep with ur boss...flirting and some physical affection can boost ur career

    Surprisingly this is not limited to offices alone but in colleges where internal marks are needed...the same solution applies

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  3. Let's not talk about Paris Hilton. She's never in the press for new reasons any more. And she won't get any smarter! She's just another bimbo.
    As for sleeping with bosses, you should watch the movie, 'Secretary'. It deals with just that.
    As for India having the oldest ministerial candidates, let's just say, "Hamare adarsh abhi bhi puraane hain. They don't want thrust youngsters enough to give them power, sleep or not sleep with them."
    And what about men? What must they do to get a leg-up?
    And college students should not be told off for cheating anymore.
    Nice one again, Purba.

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  4. brilliant post!
    soaked in sarcasm and dipped in humor!
    taken with a pinch of salt it sure is all fun with figures ;)

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  5. Prateek...which one?

    Jon...I would like to believe, only a few resort to such tactics.

    D2..LOL @ hamare adarsh puraane hain.
    The men according to the report have their "men's club" to fall back on.

    magiceye...Thank god you liked it!!! :D

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  6. I didnt mean that literally...

    but apart from joke...it has become a reality, even if there is 1 or 2 out of 100 who resort to that...it's alarming(source: my college lecturer friend)

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  7. Sleeping with the boss, to an extent is a reality but can happen only with consensus.

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  8. I wonder if men can sleep with their female bosses to get a push up :)

    About India's age, we generally revere old people - just because they're old. Doesn't make much sense, but there it is... So when it's a contest between a young "upstart" and someone with white hair, we all know who will win.

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  9. Let's not talk about the Paris bimbo, she makes the same old news time & again..!

    I have also read that article about sleeping with bosses, male bosses in particular! I hate that attitude. I agree with Jon. In colleges, for internal marks, you wouldn't believe the levels of flirting girls do to boost their marks..! Can anybody tell what guys can do other than study to boost marks!!!

    Very sarcastic and funny, loved this post :)

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  10. Jon...Psst, do a sting, India TV style!

    BK Chowla....Exactly, you do it because you want it. Nobody is holding a gun to your head.

    B J P...I'm sure it happens and would love to read about it.
    We elect them and then take pot shots at them . What's wrong with us!!

    Girish..Ahh... Paris the bimbette.
    If girls in college are flirting for a few extra marks, that's really sad.
    Guys this topic is begging for attention, write about it!!

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  11. lol so thats why people prefer a good night sleep after marriage haha! Hilarious.

    Paris gave a bad excuse but she gets away with it!!

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  12. Nice post. I love the way you bring sarcasm in :P

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  13. Aditya...Yupp, the secret behind a rocking marriage is a good night's sleep.

    Kish ..:))

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  14. That was a very well written post full of delicious sarcasm!Your stats on the political boss' age will put off any aspiring woman politician fool enough to take the survey seriously! LOL

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  15. Paris could really do with a portion of an Indian brain. I'd give her, say one-tenth of an average Indian brain, and we'd see wonders, really!

    I feel sorry for her. She should be a case-study of sorts at B-schools.

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  16. If the boss is cute then surely (few) girls wouldn't mind sleeping with him. ;) Just kidding! :D Btw even Rahul Gandhi, who is supposed to be one of the youngest politicians, is kinda old, isn't he?

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  17. everytime i see something like this, i feel the world is one step closer to coming to an end.
    whats worse is, i see a lot of women encourage this to further their careers. And one look at the sorry men around who only wished they were women tells the tale.

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  18. Zephyr...All you have to do is think of Narasimha Rao and you'll be off politics for the rest of your life :)

    mazingout...Paris should make for a wonderful case study; how to mine minimal content for maximum gain.

    Nethra...Cute bosses are always welcome. They make for good eye candy. And the definition of old keeps changing with time :)

    Vinni... I think in the end it all boils down to priorities. We are answerable to no one but ourselves.

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  19. My god...KAHAAN se KAHAAN your storyline went! I think its time you start writing scripts for Hindi movies :P

    But seriously, well-strung bits of news, along with your trademark spicy humor :)

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  20. hilarious!! :)When you were talking about youngest politician aged 64, i remembered abouot KPI's youth wing?? the leader was 64 years old :)
    I sometimes feel pity for Indian women, mostly bosses are old, fat, ugly most of the time :-p. They have this attitude of "ÖK I am the boss, so what if i am fat, unfit potbellied, I should get comfort and you your promotion".

    Here in Europe, bosses no matter what, maintain themseleves. They are fit and not potbellied.

    In India men get married usually for life, so no matter how he looks, the wife has to adjust. But here if men are not satisfying, they can divorce ..

    This is I think because of culture difference.

    Nice read. Cheers.

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  21. Its a piece of ''great thought and remark on success chasers with sleeping with boss philosophy'' from a great writer.Sarcasm is must for those ....''----------''

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  22. Avi...Hindi movie scripts should be so much fun...break for song..break for item number...break for hero introduction

    Bhawna...Indian politics suffers from "never say die" syndrome.

    Most European men are drool worthy :)

    Pratibha...:))

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  23. Considering most celebrities are 'brands' managed by some other people, I'm intrigued about Paris Hilton's case.

    She started off being herself, but clearly managed to hire some of the best and most talented brand managers. She has a consistent image (eg. the photograph on top), always manages to be in the news (cocaine, common!) and earns a boatload of money with all her endorsements.

    Shes one celebrity whose managed to survive so long without the aid of any talent.

    Hats off to her!

    (Oh, and, by the way, awesome post!)

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  24. Aw ! Paris how innocent ;) I read all the news except for the apple one. Eve and Newton should thank the comet of all the people :P

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  25. Kartikay..Isn't she a miracle of sorts?

    Lakshmi..Am waiting for Stephen Hawking's expert opinion.

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  26. Sleeping with boss?.......may be confined only to high end jobs and that too in cosmopolitan cities.
    It is a news to me that Five judges belonging to the state subordinate judiciary were caught copying while writing their master of law exams.God save the country and judiciary. Amen.

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  27. The judges should have know better than to give away the "evidence" and trying to take law (exam) into their own hands ...

    As far as Paris Hilton goes, I am happy at the improvement that she took an effort to lie .. the last time she just admitted ... 't was unbearable ...

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  28. Purba - Good that you changed the template. I was thinking of mentioning it you.

    I so much wanted to read this post of yours, but every time I opened it, I really couldn't coz of the template you had used till some time back.

    BTW - very nicely written.

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  29. oh...that was insightful but to no avail as female bosses are rare. keep up the good work!!!

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  30. I wish to keep off sex and politics this morning!
    I love the way you look at the world...you put a smile on my face...:)

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  31. S R Ayyangar...It's happens all the time, only we chose to close our eyes to it.

    Flawsophy...Look, right now am too busy admiring "flawsophy". Stroke of genius I must say.

    Dhakkanz...The orange was me getting patriotic. Now back to my serene self. And thank you.

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  32. Nikhil Bhaskar... :))

    Nalini...Sex and politics is a heady combination. Glad, I could make you smile.

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  33. Not only politicians, even majority of bosses in the corporate world are uncles with pot bellies! So save us all god! :)

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  34. Thats some good reading.Thanks.

    About the judges caught copying,maan thats shocking...and scary!!I mean seriously,whats our country coming to.

    And about women using their charms for promotion,most women do it I guess,intentionally or unintentionally.As far girls doing it in college,I guess this is where all young girls figure out how gullible guys are.

    What are we guys supposed to do?Maybe the future generation of bosses will all be women and a couple of decades down the line someone' gonna be writing about how guys who sleep with their bosses are more likely to get promoted.

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  35. Ana_treek... Oye! it's your prerogative entirely.

    nonsensicalrambling...Hey the poor judges were too busy judging!! They didn't get enough time to prepare.

    Sleeping with women bosses doesn't sound like a scary proposition!

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  36. Well if you want to hire an advocate in AP/Hyderabad think twice. Hopeless... for them mobile is only to make/receive calls, SMS/ emails are alien activity for them.

    Least we expect them (advocates/judges) to know the law (subject) and the truth is out ... copying ..

    No wonder the court proceedings are slow and much slow in AP.

    The political system is a big drama .. better watch the movie Rajanith some good looking faces.

    Sleeping with boss(male or female)? this concept is not a new thing ..
    Sadly someone who made it to the top with merits is also tagged.

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  37. I would so love the 'Sleeping Strategies' paper in my curriculum!

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  38. amazinggggggggg.
    loved the critics and news. nice pov.

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  39. Rita...Not everybody who makes it to the top compromises. But it makes people happy assuming the worst.


    MMB...I am sure you would :))

    Deepika...Glad you liked it.

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  40. Ultimate....What to say, Well I have seen many such people climbing ladder fast. Bitter truth is that everyone knows this and it is well accepted in corporate sector.

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  41. I completely disagree with what people above have said. I am completely against any kind of sexual harassment to start off with, that being said morality is very subjective.

    Now think of it in this a way and assume that I don;t come off as a grumpy misogynist.

    "There is a babe who joins a firm who wants success by any means. To her physical intimacy means nothing.

    So now she wants to sleep with her manager to get a leverage. If the manager concedes to that it is not a problem.

    BUT[I can't stress this enough] if sleeping with your intern is the only way you will allow them the growth that they deserve then it is wrong.

    It then becomes a case of sexual solicitation which shouldn't be tolerated.

    But this is a very highly inefficient system and private sectors cannot progress with this kind of mental outset.

    That is why in leading companies you have to sign a bond saying that you won't date any one from your office. Problem solved.

    It saddens me that there are so many readers who are so judgmental about promiscuity rather than emotional honesty.

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  42. you are very good... you can keep the tempo high...


    ॐ नमः शिवाय
    Om Namah Shivaya
    http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com/2011/02/whispers-tanka-and-search-for-being.html
    Connect with me at Twitter @VerseEveryDay

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  43. Excellent stuff! Keep writing!

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  44. Very well written. And I think ONLY men should be held responsible for this rubbish going on.

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  45. Your article is very interesting. I like the way that you connected all bits of information..

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  46. "he copy cat judges have been placed under suspension by Andhra Pradesh HC. Lawmakers 'makers' turn lawbreakers." makers* typed twice.

    "miss-understanding." it is mis-understanding.

    this was much better when compared to the gadaffi post. :)

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  47. Oh,what a news it was.To boost the carrier of women,is it the proper way ...
    Work From Home India

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  48. i pity the women who have to deal with 64.4 year old perverts!

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  49. i usually hear that world has changed drastically but this much(!!), one has to do whatever his or her boss says!!

    @purba.. its really an eye opener, thanks.

    ( and sorry i found your blog now, i mean it is the blog which i was searching, awesome postings. keep updating.:))

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