|Courtesy - OutlookIndia.com|
It has been a busy month for me. Managing smear-campaigns and weaving conspiracy theories is not an easy job. But I am “tyre-less” and not a stepni as that retired sanyasin, Uma Bharti would like to believe. I left no stone unturned to make Rahul Baba’s birthday party truly memorable. Dressed up as a clown, I jumped from behind the curtains and sang Happy Birrrrthdayyy to yooooo….. in a breathy Marilyn Monroe style. I ordered the birthday boy’s favourite – chicken wings from KFC but made sure none of them were right wings. Before I could pat myself on the back for doing such a commendable job, my eyes beheld the ungainly sight of Pranab Da and Chiddy at the party. I didn’t want to burst into tears and make a spectacle of myself. Instead I promptly arranged musical chairs. A fun way to pull chairs from under their saggy bottoms. It was painful trying to make Rahul Baba win, the boy just stood there smiling and waving rather than run. But one look at Madam’s beaming face and I knew it was worth the effort.
I will now be canvassing to make 19th June - Rahul Baba’s birthday as Children’s Day. It’s time to move on to a fresh new face, in all his dimpled glory. And who wouldn’t want to have a cherubic child like our crown prince!
My own birthday on 28th of February should be marked as National Owl Day. Many moons back my auspicious entry was marked by the hooting of 72 owls – so loud that all of Raghogarh converged at our haveli to see this one of a kind baby. And what they saw is still etched in their memory – a baby with his foot stuck firmly in his mouth. All these years and I have been unable to get my foot out. Someone even wrote that I should come with an instruction manual that reads: Open Mouth, Insert foot. Funny...
I have always been different. I was a sickly, snotty kid who no one paid attention to. So I would keep myself busy digging. I would dig deep and yet come up with nothing. So I started bragging about my imaginary discoveries and keep the villagers enthralled. And thus I came to be known as Diggy Raja – the Raja of diggers!