Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Life etc.


Courtesy : Wisie.com


Compassion and I have been best friends for as long as I can remember.  I was all of four when I tried to save half a dozen fish from drowning.  As I was engaged in the earnest endeavour, dragging them out of the school water tank with a stick, I fell in the pool of freezing water.  I was trying my best to drown when an insensitive lout of a school peon pulled me out.  Instead of being nominated for bravery awards and made to sit atop an elephant on Republic Day, I was taken to the Principal’s office.

Let me announce at the onset that this is a pointless post.  In fact I don’t even know what I am going to write about.  Aren’t there times when you venture out for a walk and have no idea where you are heading?  You just know you want to be outside, so you inhale the scent of the Hasnuhana trees, admire the striking couple that passes you by, pat the Labrador as it looks at you with those lugubrious eyes.  You don’t have to keep a tab on the kilometres you walk, no calories to burn, no destination to reach.  Aimlessness can be liberating - it frees you from expectations and you have no disappointments to fear.  I wish life could be like that.

Today I will let my thoughts meander.  I have no news to share, no point to make, I may not make you laugh, but I still invite you to join me on this journey.  It’s no fun being on your own. 

Nostalgia is a seductive mistress.  How often have we huddled together with friends and family and dipped into the vat of collective memories for some succour.  We laugh ourselves silly, sometimes blame each other for unspoken torment and invariably end up confessing our so called misdemeanours.  Like the time when my Dadu banned me from reading the Godfather and I still went ahead and read it. At thirteen when I tried shaping my eyebrows, I ended up snipping away half of it. For weeks I faced the world looking like Spock from Star Trek.  Every time Ma said No to me, I went ahead and did it.  They were my small victories and I cherished each one of them. 

I was always restless, I still am.  My daughter tells me she gets tired just looking at me.  I can’t sit still, I can rarely relax and always need something to keep me occupied.  I work myself to exhaustion and crib about it.  Is it because I am scared to face the eternal ‘what next’?  Is it because I have no clue what it’s going to be?  Of course I know what I will be eating for lunch and dinner for the next seven days – that’s how organized I am.  But I do wish that I could let go.  Surrender myself and let time take me wherever it wants to. Not be consumed with a sense of guilt about wasting it.


They say as you grow older, you lose your sense of wonder.  The world becomes a habit.  How tragic that most people have to get ill before they understand what a gift it is to be alive!  Yet we prefer to immerse ourselves in the mundane.  We battle with deadlines, get stressed, complain about lack of time. What a waste of life.

I feel compassion has become a thing of the past. It is getting replaced by cynicism instead.  And if empathy does exist, it is reserved only for our own plight.  Poor me, what a hard life I have.

We mourn the past and wait for happiness tucked away in the distant horizon.   I feel sorry that that the current generation has become acquainted with political realism and cynicism, so early in life.  It has robbed them off their innocence. 

Have you noticed on public platforms how fashionable it has become to express outrage – at the system, the boss, our colleagues, our friends who have no time for us.  Nothing seems perfect anymore.  How easily we judge, how easily we make fun of others.  A part of me was feeling sorry for Schettino(captain of the ill fated Costa Concordia) dubbed as Captain Coward by the International press.  After all he acted purely on instinct, to save himself from the sinking ship.  Agreed it was him who engineered the catastrophe.  But do you know how you will react when your life is under threat?

When some crazed person shows throws a shoe at Rahul Gandhi, our first instinct is to crack jokes at his expense.  When Barkha Dutt threatens to take legal action against a troll, we make a nasty #BarkhaBarks in her honour.

What if it’s you the next time?

Hate is expressed so casually that it scares me.  Temper is not meant to be lost but held for dear life. In this age of online scorn and public break-ups, it has become so easy to delete relationships.  One stray, uncomfortable incident and we are ready to block the unfortunate soul for the rest of our lives.  It has become so much easier to despise than love.

But then I am over-generalising and resorting to intellectual laziness.  What may be true for many may not be true for you.  It’s passion that makes us achieve the unachievable.  It’s love that makes life so beautiful.  And it’s enthusiasm that is the most potent aphrodisiac.

Let’s not embrace cynicism so easily.  Let’s not think of love as dispensable.  And never underestimate the power of positive thinking- it is just another term for faith.  Your unconscious mind has the power to turn wishes to reality.  Believe me once you make up your mind nothing is unachievable.

And this reminds me I have to save the fish I saw drowning in the aquarium nearby.   I could certainly do with some help.  So who’s joining me?





116 comments:

  1. "How tragic that most people have to get ill before they understand what a gift it is to be alive!"...SO TRUE!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Pity. Despite knowing our time is limited, we end up wasting it.

      Delete
  2. We have become so reactive to everything and anything around us that even if we do not understand something we like to comment and react to get attention. We do not see the commonality in all of us:) Nice post!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And isn't it a dangerous trend. Despite being out of depth, people will insist on giving their opinions! Just because it is fashionable to do so!

      Delete
  3. Aimlessness is good. Personally, I have no idea why I do anything or what I will do next. I just make it up as I go along. :P
    Agree about the cynicism. We have become cynics. The last time a girl told me that she liked me, my first reaction was a stare and a scornfull "Yeah"

    PS You were a nerd and a rebel? Ha :P

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You have all the reasons to doubt that girl. In fact send her to me please, I need to drill some sense into her.

      Nerd? not really..loved reading...anything to escape studies.

      Delete
    2. :O You will bash her?
      Not a nerd? You are the first woman I know who has confessed that she watched Star Trek.
      By the way, count me in the next time you wish to save those fish. The poor creatures *sob* We must go to the sea. There are so many that need our help. How cruel life is. And to think that we call ourselves the most intelligent species and leave the other creatures to such a terrible fate. What are we becoming? Are we some kind of sadist psychopaths?

      Delete
    3. Does the water tank in your house have a direct sea link? Then I better carry a shoal and dunk them there. You can all have tea party...yayyy

      Delete
  4. I like the way u express everything. i find some similarities with urs. i too started to express what i feel by blog. i wil shell out my feelings each day.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is one of my rare introspective posts. When I sat down to write, I had no idea what I would be saying.

      Delete
  5. Purba, that was a sweet post!Cynicism breeds contempt and life is too short to crib n waste time on trivial things! Lets join hands n save some fish:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The fish need our empathy :) How was your trip to Singapore?

      Delete
  6. That was a good one. We do indeed have skewed prorities in life when getting to the top is the most important, no matter at what cost or at whose cost or what means. This single objective is the reason why there is so much hatred and negative energy flowing in this world. We are all so busy saving drowning fishes, sigh...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Our objective in life should be to seek happiness and let others be. And look what we end up doing instead!

      Delete
  7. This aimless walk with you has turned to be quite a ride.
    You should take us for your walks quite often. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If you willing to tolerate my ramblings, why not? :D

      Delete
  8. Incidentally, the last part of your post is very close to the message delivered in one of the movie reviews I wrote recently.
    A friend of mine always says ... our life is in our own hands, it is completely up to us to make it or break it :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's a big responsibility isn't it? To live a full life?
      Which movie did you review?

      Delete
  9. Purba,

    ZARAA HATKE Post but very thought provoking at the same time. You summed it up very rightly.

    Take care

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Zaraa Hatke sounds like a Hindi movie script :D
      Well I was just thinking aloud. Thank God it made sense.

      Delete
  10. totally agree with this about break ups and all.. its common and you know seriously I do feel i shud have been born now, rather then trying to make ONE relationship work I could have had many and then have the attitude who cares.. Ah well Ican alway blame this on my parents for bringing me too early ...


    I do understand what you mean by saying the power of being positive but LIFe is hard it teaches us a lot of things and sadly the majority of it is sad. If we look carefully happy moments are lesser then sad ones :) but then thinking about it maybe its only in my life ..

    and that made me chuckle the making of the eyebrows.. Well I did that too when i wanted to look like one of the indian Baddies in film and almost shaved off my hair to the horror of my parents thats when i found religion , i am a sikh :) ooops

    Hate well i did not believe in that at all, I use to be a carefree go lucky person who smiled at anything and everything and make a fool of himself but then LIFE happened and hence Now I have learnt to HATE tooo :)

    good post made me realise a lot of things .. Thank you

    Bikram's

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bikram you view the world in black and white. Learn to accept the greys :)

      Delete
    2. Trying to beleive me when i say that .. trying my level best to have that GREY .. it will do wonders for me he he he
      Thanks purba.

      Delete
  11. lovely blog,,,you write so well . I loved your post about desi girl and outsourced parenting. your newest follower here. you can visit me at http://purplechronicle.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for the follow. Will be looking at your link soon :)

      Delete
  12. Very mature thoughts....most of us behave the same way in similar situations...And yes, we have become too opinionated and too judgmental and too cynical...sad.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And God forbid if you are a celebrity! We don't think twice before taking them down the pedestal and making them the object of our ridicule.

      Delete
  13. What a post Purba! I couldn't have imagined something like this from your blog, especially when mostly I have read political satire or humorous posts...

    But, we all are culprits aren't we?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We are part of that herd Chintan - we are no different. But we need to stop and wonder where we are heading.

      And I do tend to ramble once in a while. It is cathartic :)

      Delete
  14. no pointless post this is! I actually read it twice to let those wonderful thoughts seep in! not only r u a fabulous writer but a deep thinker too :)

    sarah

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Praise invariably elicits an inarticulate response from me - I am always at a loss for words. Thank you :)

      Delete
  15. It is definitely nice to be 'free', have nothing to do, just whiling away time. Why not enjoy the little time we have for us before we lose it in thoughts and worries? And yes, celebrities are definitely having a tough time mending twitterers!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nivedita the saddest part is most of us do not know how to handle freedom. Having nothing to do is just a fantasy for us and when we do get it, we have no idea what to do with it.

      Delete
  16. nice post. cannot say anything beyond this as i do resort to some of the things which u have mentioned here on my posts :D.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Beautiful post Purba.
    As much love you felt writing it, I felt reading it.

    Looking at cross-firing opinions. being a part of them and then finally realising - where exactly is it going? Is it really worth it?
    And if not, then what matters most. Atleast to me. Us.
    Path to self-discovery. A lighter me.

    Loved it. Would like to tread more such paths to life/self discoveries.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Introspection is not always pleasant - we come face to face with uncomfortable truths.

      It's up to us whether we want to ignore it or do something about it :)

      Delete
  18. Actually you made me laugh about Barkha's troll. :-)
    Me too, i am sick and tired of planning and thinking what next. These days i am just living my present, i am sick and tired of thinking about future and brooding about past. I am getting good counselling from my hubby, i call him no matter where i am to hear his voice.
    I am seriously sick and tired of being born as a human.

    ReplyDelete
  19. and if this is how you start and end without an agenda...we sure should be bowing before you :-)

    You echo my thoughts completely...the fast paced internet induced life has made us restless...and seeing someone as organized and so in order go through the same, is such a consolation that I am not alone...yes, the cynicism must go-the democracy not made a mockery by stupid attacks...and judgements of others should be just as much a crime as any other!

    everyone's not a hero and everyone should not consider himself as one:-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Believe me Suruchi you are not alone. We all go through phases of melancholy, elation, confusion. We question our purpose. Women tend to overthink-that's what makes us different.

      Delete
  20. I was shaking my head and negating what you had written, and then I read the third last para and you redeemed yourself :). Difficult to say if the cynicism all round has increased with time or is it more apparent with the explosion of internet avenues.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We are better informed and can vent our frustration on public platforms. Sometimes it mutates into mass hysteria.
      Guess, all of it is part of evolution.

      Delete
  21. Nice one! I am not good at writing long comments! Enjoyed reading :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, I discovered it long time back :p

      Delete
  22. So true your words were :) life is always a roller coaster ride.. we just need to enjoy the essence of it :)


    Weakest LINK

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And accept the setbacks as gracefully.

      Delete
  23. -Useful info! I bookmarked it.

    ReplyDelete
  24. this sounded like such an easy tele tele wala post...and after finishing it .... made me think so much.. so not that easy after all :) :) and definetly not pointless as you said :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have to know what tele tele wala post means :D My bad Hindi!

      Delete
  25. I am going through your ramblings again....

    ReplyDelete
  26. Purba, I just loved this post for the very simple reason that I so often speak along the same lines to many of my dear ones here. I totally believe in 'faith' and it does take one a long way. Maybe the result isnot evident the next minute but it sure will show up in some form or the other. I can ne'er crack joke at the expense of others just because i always visualise myself in their shoes.
    Wonderful post Purba,to me - one of your best:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It takes a lot to be positive Deepa. Negativity comes easily.

      I am glad empathy is still alive and kicking :)

      Thank you so much, so glad you liked.

      Delete
  27. I ended up reading the post thrice!! I have been following you for long, but you write so beautifully, that I most times feel unadequate(both language and content wise) to comment here :-(

    But lets start with positivity :-)
    I loved the post and very different from what you usually write! Being cynical is second nature to us.. But being postive always, is also not human and needs a lot of courage. Take the best of both the worlds and be realistic. Live a day as it comes withouth fretting but please do worry a bit about the future.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear God do you find my writing intimidating? I love interacting with readers, love reading what they have to say!

      And I understand what you are trying to say - an ideal approach has to be a mix of both :)

      Delete
  28. I have presented The Versatile Blogger Award to you Purba

    http://rahul-aggarwal.blogspot.com/2012/01/versatile-blogger-award.html

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Honoured to receive the award :)

      Delete
  29. Since life is on the fast track, for most of us, maybe that's why we don't wait long, before judging people or even, hating them. We don't want to lose any time, as I can comprehend.

    Nice post...Provoked me to think about many things in life.And yes, I am all game for saving the fish. Count me in :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Changing ourselves is a tad easier than changing the world :)

      Delete
  30. Hi, nice blog & good post. You have beautifully maintained it, you must try this Indian Travel Agency website which really helps to increase your traffic. hope u have a wonderful day & awaiting for more new post. Keep Blogging!


    Flexi said...Indian Travel Agency

    Travel Agency in India

    ReplyDelete
  31. Hello,
    Your blog is Very useful.I Like Very Much.
    Rajasthan Holiday Tours

    ReplyDelete
  32. You are right... Our conscious and subconscious mind has a lot of power on our life. Many dreams come true with persistent wishing at times :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You believe in it too?

      Good things happen to people who wish good of others.

      Delete
  33. I have so much Kolaveri in my life right now, that this post came as a welcome break. Thank you Purba. :) A good read always makes me happier.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Why are kids so stressed these days! And you have April to look forward to, don't you?

      Delete
  34. You know Purba I always say and blogged about it too, that we are living in the best times yet in human history. For children, women and differently abled and any minorities, for those who are not privileged, despite all the hardships, there was never a better time to be born. For those who always had it easy, it is a more comfortable life. And there is no doubt that we are moving towards better times, more awareness of human rights, more compassion, more freedom to voice our concerns; and for all the corruption, we are also better able to protest against it then ever before :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Is it because our material needs are well taken care if, we have the time to mull over the state of affairs? Express our concerns on public platforms and not letting our polity to take us for granted?

      Don't you feel there's too much outrage? Whether manufactured or genuine - I am not too sure.

      Delete
  35. All righty then, I am sending a couple of cats to help you in this earnest endeavor of saving the little fish in the little aqua-room. As for you being restless, lets say, you become Prime Minister and you'll always have something to do?
    As for me, I've taken cues from my neighbor's dog who's been taking coaching classes and tutions just to understand what to do when his master says 'STAY!'. He still doesn't understand, but I've learnt to stay all the while his master has been giving up on him. So, what was my point? Ah, that I am happy doing nothing :P
    As for hating, that is one of the terms that have been grossly overused in these times, when the attention span itself does not last for more than a few minutes.

    Nice post, you keep doing something, and I will balance you with doing nothing.


    Cheers,
    Blasphemous Aesthete

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Beautifully put Anshul. The beauty of life lies is moments - if only we could savour those instead of looking for that elusive nirvana! It exists doesn't it?

      Delete
    2. It does, in those very moments :)

      Delete
  36. enlightening post i might say...did you say 'pointless'????

    ReplyDelete
  37. Quiet a different Purba "musing" I read here or is it the new address effect ;) but quiet a positive read :)

    Btw, hope all good at the new addy! C ya laterz.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahaha..the (.com) had a calming effect on me :D

      Delete
  38. You say it's a pointless post, but I think you subconsciously drove home the point about living life to the fullest in the limited time we have. Nice post!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Delighted that my words found resonance among so many of you :)

      Delete
  39. actually Purba u can blame media for the spread of cynicism....when so much of incest,rapes by close acquaintances,teachers&gurus are reported; wouldn't v think 100 times b4 entrusting our young ones to anybody's care? time was when kids were left in neighbors' care without a thought.now i cant even think of patronizing any religious preacher,though i know goodness does exist in the common man,but how to decide whom to trust & whom not to ?doubting teachers doctors & gurus is really the height of cynicism--wouldn't u say ?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree, it is an eternal dilemma - do I stop the car for that woman desperately asking for a lift on a lonely stretch, Is that man really sick or just pretending, was that brush accidental!

      But there always be a few of us who will never stop believing :)

      Delete
  40. Is this the same Purba? Just kidding. Always knew you had a thoughtful side hiding under all that ready wit. En-Joyed your meanderings.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hehe...surprised you didn't I?

      This is one of those moments I guess :)

      Delete
  41. I like this pensive mood at A-musing :) This post is on a different beat than your usual, and equally thought-provoking.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Did you know my original title was Musing? And my first ever post was one of these thinking aloud posts? :)

      Delete
  42. i read somewhere "every day above ground is a happy day"

    so true to its meaning. one must live to enjoy every moment and should not wait for happiness to come in future because being alive today is the biggest happiness one can get in each and every moment....

    what is Hasnuhana trees purba...where do you find it??? :P:P:P

    regards
    rahul

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hasnuhana is Raat ki Raani - also known as the Lady of Night :)

      Don't you simply love the scent of the flowers?

      Delete
  43. I love the flow of the post.From rescuing poor fishes to restlessness to cynicism to love and faith...
    P:S:Restlessness is my twin.I get jittery if I have to sit still..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I still don't know which is better - restlessness or complacency?

      Delete
  44. True... I call this phenomenon constant frustration

    ReplyDelete
  45. Liked the illustration. Looking for a key?

    We are lost in the world. Shoes and slippers are only symbols. If Rahul visits the remote villages, people won't throw footwear, as the Hindu cartoon today illustrates, because they can't afford footwear!

    Let alone Rahul. Any politician deserves a shot in the heart, I think. I mean to make them realise there is something called 'heart'!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I personally dislike this trend of resorting to such tactics to vent our frustration. We snigger about it but the issue that frustrates us, doesn't go away.

      Delete
  46. That was a pointed pointlessness that left many marks before you signed off. The swift strokes of your brush touched upon nostalgia, restlessness, cynicism, anger, relationships and a lot more. Enjoyed it immensly.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And I was so sure that my randomness will make no sense!

      So glad that you liked.

      Delete
  47. Life is for living and posts such as these make us wonder what life is about!It is great to think aloud for often we all think aloud sooner or later!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I guess introspection makes us pause and think and at times question our choices.

      Delete
  48. Awesome awesome post! Beautiful meanderings Purba! Loved your whole potrayal on so many things in our simple lives! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm simply overwhelmed with the response! Thank you so much.

      Delete
  49. This is not a pointless post,I think! And the words are flowing so effortlessly!
    But at times we feel the urge to meander on the thoughts and write about everything!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, precisely why I had so much trouble thinking of a suitable title for the post :)

      Delete
  50. This is such a wonderful post. I held on to every word as I read it and nodded in agreement everywhere. Everywhere.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad you could relate to my thoughts :)

      Delete
  51. This virtual arena has definitely made it possible to "expresses at ease."
    If any tom, dick and harry can post, hiding behind the wall of anonymous, and others, well others with names equally misleading, it is far from a one to one conversation. It is at best a luxury, free shot, no backfire.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It scares me to know that it could be my unassuming neighbour who's spewing vitriol behind the garb of anonymity.

      Delete
  52. Hello,
    Your blog is Very useful.I Like Very Much.
    Rajasthan Holiday Tours

    ReplyDelete
  53. That was a hilarious and refreshing post and at the same time a thought provoking one. :) Aimlessness is good and letting go relaxes us sometimes. Your post was a nice little fun journey. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Letting go is the ultimate stress buster.

      Delete
  54. Attractive element of content. I simply stumbled upon your website and in accession capital to say that I get actually loved account your weblog posts. Anyway I will be subscribing in your augment or even I achievement you access persistently rapidly.
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    ReplyDelete
  55. Deep thought provoking and intelligent write up !

    ReplyDelete
  56. Nice article, enjoyed thoroughly... I am bad at writing comments :(

    ReplyDelete
  57. This is what I want to read like when I write. On my way. On my way.

    ReplyDelete

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