Sunday, May 13, 2012

Hey Ram! Leave Sita alone








Courtesy - Google

I wonder why people refuse to let go of Sita? The lady renounced public life 7000 years back and went underground. Hopefully after years of wilderness, she found salvation there. Sita was a case of bad karma. Despite having everything – good looks, royal lineage, moolah and a prince charming, she led a life far worse than a beleaguered tele bahu.

If you can’t stop outraging about how much your life sucks and what a wimp your boss is, it’s time you knew what the lady had to go through. The loyal one, who willingly followed her banished husband, wasted her youth in the jungles. Sita has many firsts to her credit - the first recorded case of a woman who dared to cross the line.

Unfortunately she got abducted by a Sri Lankan ten headed monster with a major dandruff problem. She was also the first Indian woman to fly in a private jet and travel abroad, inspiring a New York based travel agency to name itself after her – Sita Travels.

Even though she does get reunited with Ram after a daring rescue mission that looked straight out of a James Bond novel – Sita doesn’t get to live a happily after. Constantly doubted and made to sit for various exams, a pregnant Sita finally gets thrown out by her self-righteous husband. A husband who should have stood by his loyal wife, chose to pay heed to a Dhobi trying to act like the social media. When he should have said - Shutup! My wife is my personal matter, he ended up saying Get lost wifey, my Dhobi hates your face!

Imagine Abhishekh Bachhan abandoning Aishwarya just because the media can’t stop passing mean comments about her weight gain and her colourful sartorial choice!

Ironically people are still quoting from epics without probably having read or understood the underlying message. A Congress of fools, in a rare show of camaraderie, implored PJB to commit the same mistake as Ram and dump their bearded soul mate Modi.

Now that PJB is Ram, it’s only fair to compare the Congress of fools to Ravana. Come to think of it, the party does have too many heads and not one of them sees eye to eye.


Will the Bhartiya Party of the Public now wait for the C-party scion to do a Sita haran with NaMo and keep him imprisoned in a Dalit hut? If the self-righteous PJB does dump the Gujarat CM, will Modi jump in the nearest manhole to seek salvation? And most importantly, is the C party suggesting that it’s perfectly normal to torch cities with the mere swish of your tail?

Will all these secrets be revealed break ke baad? Unlikely. We all know politics is no Ramayana but a Mahabharata.

If PJB is expected to do a Ram, then Mumbai HC judge PB Majumdar expects womankind to do a Sita. While hearing an appeal by a husband seeking divorce from his wife on the ground that she was not willing to shift with him to Port Blair where he was transferred, Judge Majumdar counselled - "A wife should be like goddess Sita who left everything and followed her husband Lord Ram to a forest and stayed there for 14 years."

Yeah, right! Try spending a night in Maoist infested jungles before dispensing such sagely advice.

When Sita heard this bullshit, she had no choice but to break her vow of silence. She sighed – Ahh, the joys of being a single mother with not a single paisa for child support! And the burn marks from the Agni Pariksha still hurt.

Port Blair residents are fuming because the Judge dared compare this idyllic town to a forest!

The modern Nari chortled – Somebody please tell the Judge, a wife is not a Hutch Puppy! The only forest we’ve heard of is, Forest Essentials. And doesn’t he know that it’s distance that makes the heart grow fonder? It’s only when our husbands leave for office, do we start missing them!

And just because your memory is shorter than Poonam Pandey’s skirt, doesn’t mean we’ll let history repeat itself.
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112 comments:

  1. been reading blogs after a long time...your satires and sense of humor always leaves me happy..

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    1. Glad I could make Daddy proudest smile.

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  2. Sita always brings out the best in you. You just love her and Ravan(not the two movies I am sure). You should write a version of Ramayana, seriously.
    Agree with the line that people have this bad habit of quoting scriptures without really understanding them. Not just scriptures, they will quote anything that they feel will make them sound intelligent.

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    1. The more I read about her, the more she fascinates me. A loving wife wronged but her self-righteous husband. Yet history remembers him as Maryada Purushottam Ram?

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    2. if this is what purushottam is all about, no wonder we less extraordinary men do the things we do... yippee, my heritage liberates me...

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    3. When it comes to exploiting our women, we are never short of inspiration.

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  3. So true Purba.. How do you manage to make the sad truth of India so funny... :)

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    Replies
    1. Humour is the best coping technique :)

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  4. Reading you after along time. This is Purba in her true avatar :-)
    Loved it.

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    1. Sigh! I wish I knew what my true avatar was.

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  5. I have never been a Ash fan but she deserves respect for her choices...to opt for labour pains, to breast feed her baby and to take care of her kid minus the ayahs...You are so right. The media needs to leave her alone. I dread how they will react when she walks the red carpet at Cannes with all her happy weight.

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    1. Absolutely! Giving her child priority over beauty. Only a strong woman can do that. She deserves respect.

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  6. And Sita returns...bringing back what Purba does best, sketching sarcasm and humour best with her. Back after a while, loads of posts to read-happy to begin with here :-)

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    1. SO happy to see you back Suruchi :-)

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  7. Read about the sita thing in news by mumbai court. Expecting some blog. Wonderful blog with the realities.

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    1. That a respected judge could come up with such a statement - shocking!!

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  8. Sita and you make an awesome combination :D Somehow she brings out the best of your writing skill :D
    I was pretty disgusted with the Judge saying that woman should follow her husband like Sita! As we dont know what happened next :P
    And I m just fed up with the Ash's weighty issues which are more important to media than other things!

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    1. I think we should all respect Aishwarya's choices and leave her alone.

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  9. haha the sita is back.. and sita flying in a private jet for the first time, :-)

    Very witty post! satire at its best!

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    1. The more I read about Sita, the more she fascinates me.

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  10. Very well-written! Great satire on the prevailing times.

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  11. Purba,

    A good dig at all those who preach quoting Ramayan. The comment of our Hon'ble Judge shows mindset without even knowing full facts. True picture of resorting to Holy scriptures when all logic fails.

    Take care

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    Replies
    1. A bunch of hypocrites, if you ask me. They should be asked to practice what they preach.

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  12. You have left nothing for me to say now.. I had my laughs in the article ...


    Bikram's

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  13. Nice dig at Ramayana there. Yeah, Ram's one weakness was that he always had to please everybody!

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    1. A futile exercise, if you ask me!

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  14. Haha... Ram is probably a lot like our PM. He says nothing, but wants to appear extremely self righteous.

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    Replies
    1. Our PM is remote controlled by Her Highness.

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  15. Hey, just read another masterpiece from the lady of substance Sittaire and the one who oozes immense confidence, salute to you Mam and looking fwd for more posts,

    Regards,

    Major Anurag Singh

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    Replies
    1. Feel humbled by your generous appreciation.

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  16. A hilarious post Purba ! Loved the Dandruff Ravan :D, interesting take on Ramayan. Although NaMo is no Sita, he is quiet resourceful & not so helpless.

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    1. NaMo is more powerful than all of BJP put together.

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  17. The modern times are like six blind men trying to describe an elephant with a touch of whatever part it is feeling to describe the creature. You have cited enough examples, Purba to illustrate this so I do not need to add any more:)

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    1. But exploitation of the weak and struggle for power has always existed!

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  18. I like the way you mix two topics into one add so much of sarcasm and still it makes me laugh!!
    "My Dhobi does not like your face!"~ Where do you come up with such stuff.

    I think Ramayana was the first soap in terms of sniffling women and communication issues .Kaikeyi wanted Bharat to be the King.She should've simply called Ram and told him that.Ram,I'm sure,would've agreed.No Vanvaas,no sita haran,no agnipareeksha.And nobody would've asked me to be servile like Sita maiyya!!!

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    1. Sad na, how people unnecessarily complicate their lives!

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  19. बेहतरीन व्यंग्यात्मक रचना पुरबा जी

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  20. hmmmmmmmmmmmm..........not quite sure what to make of your post...i never am comfy with ram, the way acted with sita....and i guess sita was way too good a wife for him :)

    http://sushmita-smile.blogspot.in/

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    Replies
    1. Values have changed and so have principles. What seems so wrong now was perfectly acceptable, back then!

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  21. Sita actually was more liberated than she is being portrayed as by those who haven't got a clue about her character. In fact, all our goddesses and women from history and mythology were liberated and strong. So how come they have become so oppressed in recent centuries? Systems haven't changed, power structures have. Loved this take on Sita :)

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    1. But when you read the Mahabaharat, you realize how women are traded to forge alliances. Women who once had the right to choose their husbands, were later given away as prizes in archery contests!

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  22. oh my dear mother, how do you manage to write this well!!! LOL triple times!!!!
    Re: Sita syndrome:a wonderful S. India researcher whose name escapes my mind at this moment wrote a piece on Goddesses--how there are two levels of goddesses--one, the independent ones like Durga (who drank and flirted) and Kali (who was a nudist and a rebel) and the domesticated goddesses like Lakshmi, Sita and how in course of history we have adulated and given higher positions to domesticated Goddesses compared to independent ones...how many folks outside Bengal call their daughter Durga as compared to Lakshmi or some such versions?

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    1. Kali has always fascinated me - truly primal and wild, indifferent to the world.

      Are you by any chance referring to Devdutt Patanaik, the famous mythologist?

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    2. No. The chapter is in a book titled "Is the Goddess a Feminist?: The Politics of South Asian Goddesses" and the chapter author is Rajeshwari Sunder Rajan.

      Yes, Maa Kali evokes something within me too...but I don't find her indifferent--actually I find her consummately obsessed with us, so much so that she rushes towards us in a frenzy, forgetting her clothes, hair blown, teeth unbrushed, focused so much on us that all else is thrown aside. She is a mother worried about her child in distress.

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  23. This is the age of the social deformer!!

    Well defined evolved characters!

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    1. The past always seems better than the present :-)

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  24. Hi

    I hold similar views about Sita...

    This reminds me of that scene from the movie Lajja where Madhuri playing the role of Sita in a play gives the audience a piece of her mind in a angered state and the crowd turns violent...

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    1. I haven't watched that movie :)

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  25. Omg you were on a roll through this one! Loved the post!:D

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  26. Some men need a prod into the present. You do it awfully well.

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    1. Loved the phrase, awfully well. Quite an oxymoron :p

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  27. Very well written. Loved the way it has been potrayed..

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  28. Purba you never fail to entertain,keep blogging ,i love to read you.

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    1. And your feedback is always so positive!

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  29. I just saw this news in TOI a while ago and was laughing at it !
    Getting a divorce for not moving somewhere is still fine ,but expecting every woman to be a 'Sita' is so not fine !

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    1. Such a regressive attitude is simply not acceptable!

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  30. The learned Judge forgot to mention that women should also be like Sati and Savitri besides Sita :-|

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    1. Sati, Savitri and the rest of her pious cousins!

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  31. lol,lol,lol,lol. what more is there to say.

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  32. Hey sunshine! Love your Sita so darn much :)Please to be writing a book on her. Me want an autographed copy. You'd make an awesome lawyer to fight her case.....anyone told you that? Keep it coming.

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    1. Aww...thanks so much!
      Btw, I did write a Sita series in form of emails she sent to her mother :D

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  33. Yup I read those too. You seriously ought to consider publishing them. I think they are one of your best till date.

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    1. I had a blast writing that series :D

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  34. Nice perspective, Purba!

    Loved your sense of humour and the way you related the Indian legend to contemporary issues.

    Keep 'em coming!

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    1. I wish people would leave our mythological heroes alone!

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  35. Unique & interesting perspective. I like it a lot. Great satire. It was a entertaining post.

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    1. Thanks for your appreciation.

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  36. real nice post this, but comparing RAM to Congress :D ROFL!!!!

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  37. Very interesting account. I love the way you think. People should just leave it alone. If they do this with other religions there would be chaos.

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    1. Religion is a matter of choice. Unfortunately it's used as an excuse to control the masses.

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  38. Loved the satire.
    The 10 heads of Ravan with massive dandruff probs and the party heads that can never look at each other. LOL.
    Well, my doubt is, why only sita? There wr Goddesses who never constrained themselves inside a home and wasted their life, who fought for a cause. Why don't people remember them once in a while? Given a choice, I'd prefer to share my life with some rebellious and independent bold lady like them and not one like sita.

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    1. Ramayana has many versions and each one of them portrays the characters differently!

      Try getting your hands on A Ramanujan's - 300 Ramayanas.

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    2. Purba, most religious texts have various versions, the Gita, Bible, Koran etc. I guess the ones that was officially allowed became accepted one. The other versions was suppressed.

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  39. Incredibly well written!! Loved it even more because I am an ardent fan of mythologies and this "interpretation" of mythologies in modern context was brilliant.
    Loved the bit about junior AB dumping Ash for her weight issues. I agree. There are many other excellent reasons to dump Ash but not for this :)
    BTW : Have you read Iravati Karve's "Yuganta" ? If not, please read it asap. If you can't find the book, let me know - I'll lend you my copy.

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    1. No, I haven't read the book. Right now it's Devdutt Patanaik's version of Mahabharta that's captured my attention.

      Appreciate your offer :-)

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  40. Taking your PS:"Psst... let me know what you are thinking" for granted, I felt a pressing need to give you my feedback for this article. I really appreciate your satirical diction and catchy humor.

    Letting alone the political part of the article, I find it hard to digest the conclusions you have drawn from the august epic Ramayana. All the stories we have been listening to as we grew up are not the real Ramayana. Ramayana is neither a melodrama nor a tale written for telling to kids with lullabies in the bed time. It was ingeniously framed to preach man-kind the etiquette of life regardless of one's caste, creed, region, color or profession and is so interwoven with life that you can find a impeccable solution to every problem you confront in your life. I'd rather prefer the word "psychology" to "mythology" to define Ramayana. Its the first piece of literature on motivation and personality development known to man kind.

    I don't see Ram as a Lord but as a perfect human being, and if I ever happen to come across him, I'd rather like to call him "Sir Ram" and bow to him with due respect, citing him.

    Do you think that the title "RAMAYANA" is after Ram's name? Sage Valmiki had never been a misogynist or biased. The fact that its original name was "RAMA YANA" meaning 'the journey(yana) of sita(rama)' is obscure to scores of people. Many shrouded facts will come into light and start influencing our lives once we start reading it with dedication and patience.

    Please accept my apologies if you feel i had gone to extremes in an attempt to support my cause.

    PS: Psst... let me know what you are thinking

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    1. I read your comment twice! It was such a different interpretation of the scripture. What you're saying is Rama yana was conceptualized as a moral guide book for mankind?

      Strange considering Ramayana is part of the Mahabharata and Bhishma, Drona, Arjuna, Yudishtra were all flawed characters.

      I'd like to read more about it. Can you give me a link please?

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  41. Nice Blog and this post. ... except the comment on Port Blair comparing it to maoist infested area ..... and also Aish ... she can still fetch a blockbuster ... :)

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    1. Sorry to disappoint you but not once have I compared Port Blair to a Maoist infested area. Must be my bad English :)

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  42. Great insights on the life of Sita. I believe somewhere still in India, women are expected to do things against her wish. And she cannot help it but be the victim of situation. If she rebels or comes out in open with a protest then she is bad woman, no civic sense, no sense at all.
    We have liberated the women but still a husband is not comfortable with her late night parties and mingling with other men etc. The argument and the grief of women in our country is endless. So I would just stop here by saying, very well written.
    Cheers!

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    1. He continues to subjugate her because that's the only way he knows to feed his fragile ego.

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  43. Oh the humour ! It always leave me happy :D

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  44. What a brilliant satirical piece of writing. You genuinely bring out laughs. Oh sita, she should have slapped Ram for listening to the Dhobi.

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    1. What if she did and Valmiki forgot to mention it?

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  45. I simply love reading your posts! So fun and true!

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  46. Hahahhahahhaha!! I loved the way you put it!!
    Dandruff problem!!
    *dies laughing*

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  47. How did I miss this awesome posts!!!!!
    ...and also some amazing metaphors.

    My favorite lines :)

    1. a wife is not a Hutch Puppy!
    2....doesn’t mean we’ll let history repeat itself.
    3. Sita was a case of bad karma. Despite having everything – good looks, royal lineage, moolah and a prince charming, she led a life far worse than a beleaguered tele bahu.
    4. She sighed – Ahh, the joys of being a single mother with not a single paisa for child support! And the burn marks from the Agni Pariksha still hurt.
    5.Get lost wifey, my Dhobi hates your face!

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    1. Whoa! that's quite a list. Thanks!

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  48. Ram did leave Sita alone, long back then. It was a pity, still is.

    But it is not just the Womankind that does the Sita here, it's India, our Mother (land), suffering at the hands of narrow minded fooliticians.

    Regards,
    Blasphemous Aesthete

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    1. Fooliticians, pettyticians, egoticians...one can never run short of adjectives.

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  49. Good one .... well written :)

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  50. Another one of your well written posts fusing the present and the ramayana

    Random

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  51. Loved this blog. Especially because I wrote a "somewhat" similar blog a little while ago.
    Do check it out if you are interested.
    http://prashanthkishan.blogspot.com/2012/07/cloak-of-invisble-decency.html

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  52. quite amused! great post :-)

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