Monday, June 30, 2014

Stop trying to educate Sex!


Image courtesy -iTricks.com


Our esteemed Health Minister, Dr Harsh Vardhan is of the opinion that sex education needs to be banned in schools. It may be his personal belief but I publicly agree with him.

Not even in his wildest dreams had Dr Vardhan imagined that someone would actually want to read his clean musings on dirty sex on his personal website. But that’s what people do when you are in the limelight. They start digging out old dirt in search of juicy nuggets from the past. And now his closed mind is out in the open.

As an adarsh nari who fakes headaches because she thinks sex is so chhee chhee, I completely get our newly appointed Health Minister’s sentiments. Sex has no business getting educated. It’s best left as it is – in the dark, behind closed doors, misunderstood, misused and manipulated for personal gains. In fact, sex should be treated the way women should have been in the first place – kept in the dark, and preferably in bondage. Look what education turned them into – out of control banshees, refusing to be oppressed and demanding respect - in other words, a feminist! Tell me, do we need another Frankenstein of our own making rearing its educated head?

Same goes for our children. It is unacceptable that they be burdened with knowledge that doesn’t help them pursue their parents’ dream of becoming a Nobel Laureate. It’s better for their well-being that they continue to believe that their parents had nothing to do with their conception and they were born through cross-pollination.

If our young are being troubled by hormones that make them get unholy feelings and do hanky-panky with the opposite sex, they should simply lie on their back and point their toes towards the ceiling.

That’s why one can’t help but admire the genius of Dr Harsh Vardhan for recommending that Yoga be made compulsory in schools. Look how well it has worked for Baba Ramdev! All he had to do was sit still and twitch his stomach muscles violently to repel Rakhi Sawant’s amorous designs on him.

Since Dr Vardhan’s new found modern views are meant only for public consumption to give their wagging tongues a rest, he has clarified that sex can be educated but not with crudity and graphic representation of culturally objectionable symbols . It goes against the very ethos of Indian culture that believes in keeping mum about sex because we are all so busy doing it. How else can you explain our population that continues to grow by leaps and bounds every day!


A culture so rich that it uses sex as a tool to subjugate – as cuss words to vent our frustration, as an act to intimidate, as an outlet for the perverted. Why talk about it and remove the taboos associated with it? We are better off fearing and condemning sex than accepting it as the most natural thing.

After all, it’s better having double standards than no standards at all.

Help is being sought from Hindi movie lyricists who have been successfully describing intimate acts between men and women without the mention of unmentionable body parts. NCERT has approached them to design course material for sex education that will rely solely on the use of the inanimate like - hum toh tambu mein bambu lagaaye baithe or kabootars that chadh gaya oopar re, atariya pe lotan kabootar re, gutur gutur, gutur, gutur..... With the inclusion of such lessons, our children will start treating khatiyas, bumboo and pigeons with new found respect.

Till then we should expect our school kids to emulate what their elders did when they were young –educate themselves through great works of literature by Sydney Sheldon, James Hadley Chase and Mastram or continue with the current practise of downloading ‘adult-rated’ movies starring Uncles and Aunties with breathing troubles.

On a serious note, we may go blue in our faces denying it, but the truth is, our current crop has access to more information about sex than we ever did. But what they read and browse on the net is far from the correct picture. Do we want our kids to think that most homemakers are bored nymphos ready to pounce on any salesman that knocks on their door? Isn’t it time we told them that sex is not someone’s depraved fantasy being played out to titillate? If our education system refuses to tread this tricky terrain, it becomes our duty as parents to remove all taboos associated with sex. Talk about it instead of pretending that it doesn’t exist. What our children really need is our understanding that the so called unclean thoughts that torment their minds are perfectly normal. Hey kid, it’s okay to desire someone. Let me tell you, sex is not dirty, some people are.

If only Dr Vardhan knew that sex-education doesn’t titillate but misinformation and the shroud of secrecy around it does. In fact, when delivered right, it empowers our young to make the right choices.




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88 comments:

  1. A brilliant article again Purba! Completely loved the last para.

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    1. Thanks, I just had to get it out of my system!

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  2. Good one Purba i shared your thoughts on iTimes

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    1. Thanks, Alka. I am so out of touch that I had to Google iTimes :D

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  3. very nicely composed and written... I firmly believe that hypocrite people like him is ruining our society... If sex is dirty why vatsayana wrote Kamasutra? Why hindu gods are portrayed in such positions in khajuraho?

    protesting against sex is not indian culture at all. They are manipulating indian culture to exploit women. so that the can always blame jeans, skirts, mobile phones and chow mien (anything except rapists) for rapes.

    I am happy that modern indian women are so thoughtful and intelligent.... hats off

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    1. Every society has its share of hypocrites. Our maturity lies in following what we think is right rather than letting others dictate their idea of morality.

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  4. Purba, what can one say in a nation of billion plus and ever increasing where birds and bees still rule the roost for imparting knowledge that is available at a click of mouse! Why does the culture brigade not consider Khujaraho a perfect example of liberated minds that created memorable compositions while we are still unable to decide as to what to teach in schools!

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    1. If our education system refuses to keep up with the times, it becomes our duty as parents to step in.

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  5. Purba whenever I read your blog I am in total awe! U made a valid point over here behind your hallmark sarcasm:)

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  6. LOL!
    We are heading back to 'Achhe din of Aachar, Vichar & Vyavhar"' as promised. Bollywood, be ready to get back to old days of showing 'Two flowers' falling on each other!!

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    1. That's what Dr Harsh Vardhan's plan is!

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  7. HEAR HEAR..eggjactly who needs education .. and hanky panky i hear well its all because of the way girls dress up .. nope no need for education .. waste of time that one for sure .. the honorable minister Sahib ji .. do have a point .. well on second thoughts every leader minister blah blah person .. has valid points in ourgreat nation .. I wonder when the aam aadmi will get that ... silly us the people ..

    and come on you cant say such things about the minister .. :)

    although saying that reminded me of my bio teacher oh boy she was so beautiful .. thankfully she taught us well tooo :)

    Bikram

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    1. Thanks to our first lesson on reproductive system in school, we all have special memories of our Biology teacher :D

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  8. You wise and naughty feminist, Kids born through cross pollination - haha. Great post! Do you think Harsh got carried away trying to blame western influences for everything? Didn't Khajuraho show him Indian commitment to the cause? Another clear message to him though - Sex education is necessary and should be age appropriate - google it, Harsh. But let the fact that there is a great difference between sex education and unwanted sexual overtures be part of the syllabus.

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    1. Hehehe...I didn't realize I was a feminist until I joined Twitter. Every time someone tries to put me down, they call me a feminist :p

      Khoty, we are a culture that worships Shiva's ling. And yet we continue to go blue in our faces trying to deny its existence.

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    2. Calling you a feminist was no put down, hope you know that. As for denying the existence of sex, wonder how Harsh explains away his having kids :-)

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  9. "‘adult-rated’ movies starring Uncles and Aunties with breathing troubles"..thanks for making my day.

    I'm too with the minister on this, trying to educate the world's largest population on sex is like feeding a cannon with gunpowder, an explosion will result..

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    1. As if its any better with our current levels of ignorance!

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  10. Well said, Purba. Your last para says it all.

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  11. You concluded it the best.

    Here's the problem with people like "Doctor" Harshvardhan, they themselves are so uncomfortable about sex that they can't imagine talking about it let alone teach it. He could as well be the "Unani" Hakeem , whose ads we see traveling on any route via train in India, who gives out powders to treat erectile dysfunction, or he may be worse than him. It's our nation's bad luck that we vote to bring such people to power with thumping majority. That's the night to the "Achche Din" !

    The only problem I see in sex ed classes is that the person teaching would most likely be a sex starved closeted person, just slightly more educated than the ones found whistling on streets, who can harm the kids in more than one ways. There's no way to screen pervs out of schools.

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    1. Don't tell me you didn't expect this from a party that claims to be by custodian of Hindu culture!

      About sex-ed being misused in schools, I'm sure schools can come up with audio-visual lessons that answers questions that plague every teen. I don't see why Parents can't step in that role!

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  12. Coming from a doctor, this was most shocking. But then, they prefer to watch porn in the parliament than be educated about it. Such double standards and hypocrisy.
    Good one Purba.

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    1. More than anyone else, its our esteemed Ministers who need lessons is sex-ed.

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  13. Fantastic post Purba! I will share it on all social media possible...
    On a lighter note, I loved the line - '...‘adult-rated’ movies starring Uncles and Aunties with breathing troubles.' Genius!

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    1. Saw your tweet and shared it. Thanks :-)

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  14. Brilliant. Well written. I'm amazed at this guy. Sex is something everyone needs to know about - what it is, precautions to take, etc. It also needs to be reinforced that sex is not a matter of shame or honour or morality. It's just something natural, something everyone does, like eating or sleeping or working or hanging our with buddies.... idiots like this guy push our society back by a hundred or so years.... the last thing we need, as we ours is already so regressive!

    Do read my post on the same topic too... Sex & Morality - Where's The Connection?

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    1. India has moved on, we are impatient for a change, yet our leaders continue to wallow in the past, using the garb of culture and tradition to hold us back.

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  15. You hit the nail with this one Purba. I think yours as well as Rachna's posts sum this up very well. Reached a point where I think if they do include it in the curriculum they will have two sunflowers leaning towards each other and coyly brushing against each other as the depiction for it.. that's how deeply entrenched this foolishness is :(

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    1. You'd be surprised how many Parents agree with Dr Harsh Vardhan. Most of them prefer the Ostrich mentality and fear that talking about sex will distract their kids form their chosen path.

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  16. You are a genius Purba. Loved this one :-)

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  17. So much has been said on this, yet people continue to stick to their highly selfish and conservative stances. *sigh*

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    1. It's easier to ignore the obvious than face reality :/

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  18. Yesterday when I read this news I had the same opinion, why would someone ban sex education. What is the whole point in learning integration and differentiation and trigonometry and get a certificate after that ? We never use those all our lives ! Whereas sex education is very important to impart a correct and healthy image about it which in turn helps kids to respect each other's genders as well. Knowledge about sex imparted from cheap movies and websites is what makes people think of women as objects.

    Wait, who needs sex education now?

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    1. He doesn't want to ban sex-ed but wants to make it as Sankari as possible. Perhaps he should rope in Alok Nath to do the needful.

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  19. Excellent post! I completely agree with every line, especially the last line to the 'Health Minister'. I somehow have a feeling that he might be one of those doctors whose posters we get to see while travelling by train. They read something like this: ni-santaan, swapn-dosh aur na jaane kya kya dosh waale sampark kare Dr. so and so. :-P

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    1. Hahahahaha! this description suits him to the t.

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  20. Watching porn in the Parliament is okay. Sex Education isn't. Yay to Incredible India!

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  21. Brilliant post Purba !
    Completely agree with your views.

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  22. Beautiful and scathing as always! Incidentally, I wrote on the same subject yesterday and as soon as I opened my google account I saw that you'd posted this. However, I will post it today.

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    1. And as I was penning this one I saw Rachna sharing her post on the subject on Facebook!

      Will read it.

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  23. I think visionaries like Dr Harshvardhan should encourage regressive parties like BJP to change their symbol to 'Mating Sunflowers' instead.

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  24. Absolutely, Purba! What can one do when the Health Minister instead of overhauling the system of delivering sex education in schools goes on his censorship mission. That he is a doctor is even more disappointing!

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    1. An ENT specialist who refuses to see and hear what the nation feels about this subject. But the good thing is, he has a nose for controversies :p

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  25. You, and only you, could have said it such.
    Wonderful!

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    1. When you comment, I know I have written a good post :p

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  26. Harsh Vardhan is the typical old conservative who can't ever accept truths perceived as 'indecent'.

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    1. Sex education for Dr Harsh Vardhan, please!

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  27. you just had to bring in Baba ramdev and Rakhi sawant to this no? U just had to..hahahahah youu!!!
    The last second para, screams of how cool and awesome a person you are. :)

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    1. Hehehe...trust you to notice it.

      I wanted to be cool while writing this one but ended up raving and ranting :/

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  28. Haaaww....you used bad bad words in your post. I knew Australia ruins sanskaars! And what kind of songs do you listen to?

    Also....also my dream of becoming a plumber/electrician/pizza delivery guy will just remain a dream. It is all a lie? I don't want to live on this planet anymore! *hmpf*

    P.S. Good post :D

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    1. I also discovered that there exists a song - Main hoon balatkaari.

      Try Pizza delivery. I have been told that women melt at the sight of hot Pepperoni pizzas :p

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  29. Double your standards, Double your fun!

    I had a raging argument about this very topic on FB with a rabid supporter of the idiot doctor. Apparently Abstinence and Fidelity are the answer to HIV and sex education teaches kids to be promiscuous.

    Faugh!!

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    1. Lulz! What a bunch of hypocrites we are.

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  30. Never mind! The day will come when they ban the very existence of different sex organs along with, maybe, the law of gravitation and everything will be in order :)

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    1. While we have Bollywood item numbers that continue to vulgarize the very act. Le sigh!

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  31. I think Dr wants to keep old value going, so i think we should let him... whether we talk about sex, or do not, kids these days have so much information at their fingertips that upon asking they will be able to educate parents rather than we do to them.

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  32. How I wish Dr. Harsh Vardhan would read this brilliant post!

    Take a bow! :)

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    1. He might sentence me to one of those sex-ed classes he's planning for school kids :p

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  33. Brilliant piece again...and can't agree more with the last paragraph...

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  34. Very well written...The last paragraph is the best...Hope Dr. Harshvardhan will go through this post and its comments....or some PRO from BJP reads it and share the same with him. Hope they change their views and attitudes and grow...Thanks for the nice post Purba.

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    1. I think they already know what the public feels but refuse to pay heed to it.

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  35. A true eye opener, frank and absolutely true. This generation is flooded with information and most of it is weird, out of context and is crowding their judgement. Knowledge is different from information. What our kids have is lots of information but lack the knowledge. Dr. HarshVardhan really needs a reality check. I pray with all my heart that he read this post and understand that he is talking like someone who is even older than the black and white era.

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    1. Exactly my sentiments! In this age of information overload it becomes imperative that we teach our young to differentiate wrong from right.

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  36. It seems he saw a lot movies of the 70s when it had two flowers coming close during rains ...and bingo,she was pregenant.

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    1. I think he's simply sticking to his Party's ideologies.

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  37. Poor Doc. I just returned from Konark, one of the oldest temples in India celebrated as epitome of Indian Culture and ethos. May be I should send some pictures to him, I am sure he will get some education on Indian culture if not on sex. But in support of the good doctor he may be worried about what we did without any education on sex - A billion plus people, just imagine what we will do if we were educated in sex, we will need another country. :) :)

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    1. Fact is, people who claim to be custodians of Hindu culture have very little knowledge about it.

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  38. Right.

    And then there's me who moved from Hindi movies to porn for lack of sensuality, and then, very soon from there to English movies for lack of story-line. I haven't looked back often, but I hear 'mastram' did turn out up as a movie recently.
    Such educational movies should definitely be promoted, for they don't point, there merely allude, like the kabootars and tambu-bamboo affair.

    The last 2 paragraphs were the most apt descriptions of the fault.

    Cheers,
    Blasphemous Aesthete

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    1. Porn does more harm than good for young impressionable minds. It's more titillation than education.

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  39. Once again there is someone actually speaking about things the way it is and not sugar coating it. I like. I like :) So, I did my junior college in two different places. The first place did not have any kind of difference Guy or gal. Everyone was allowed to speak to each other and it was just a completely different atmosphere. The second place however was the worst college someone could possibly join. The girls and guys had separate places to sit for lunch. Couldn't talk in class cause it was "WRONG" and anyone who did was taken to the principal. It got so sickening that the girls who participated in cultural programs would refuse to dance on stage cause they knew how the guys were going to look or talk and the more these so called smart management wanted to control things that shouldn't be happening every day there were more kids trying to do things or experiment I should say. What pissed me off the most was that every month the girls in college would be taken for a "Special class" where the lady lecturers would teach us how we should dress, not wear lipsticks and have dupatta at all times so we wouldn't attract attention which meant even dancing or taking part in sports was a big NO. Imagine that.
    Long message but I know you get the point. It is only when things are put out in the open that young guys and girls know what to do and where to draw the line. It still pisses me off that as 15-16 year olds no matter how much we tried talking to lecturers they just said thats how the college works.

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    1. you have inspired me to write a post of my own about this now. ah so worked up.

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    2. This sounds more sick than right! If we segregate the boys form the girls, keep telling them how bad sex is, how can we expect them to behave normally?

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    3. I tried looking for your post, couldn't find it.

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  40. Sigh. Every time I read a post of yours that is on fire (like this one), I come to the conclusion that this country has no hope as long as 70-year-olds with foggy minds continue to run it.
    Is there any way you can extend your stay in Australia? No point in coming back (except for the occasional visit to Gurgaon, bearing gifts for your best blogger friends)

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    1. Why not deport the 70 year old fogies to Australia and have them frolic with Dingos and Kangaroos for the rest of the remaining lives?

      And it's not as if I can't buy gifts for my best blogger friends in Gurgaon? I hope the Koutons, buy 1 get 6 sale is still on!

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  41. Perfect video for the topic here:

    http://www.storypick.com/hilarious-take-indian-sex-education-best-thing-will-watch-today/

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